How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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