she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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