She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
