Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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