Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
