And the cops told us we were all naked.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Floor bacon is actually really good
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
