We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
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