You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Is it penis luge time yet?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
