Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
