You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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