Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
