ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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