I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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