Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
