I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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