I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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