Got a toothbrush?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
