So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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