I cockslap morals
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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