so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
