I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
