Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
