Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
