I want to stick my p in your. b.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
