Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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