Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
