I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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