Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize