the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
