How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
