my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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