You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Randomize
