all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
