yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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