He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
