it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Randomize
