I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
