I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
