I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
