hotel room ftw
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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