you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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