How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
My vagina is officially offended.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
