she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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