Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
