haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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