Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
