this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
