Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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