Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
