I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
